God has really been working on my emotional attachment to people. I get so distraught over broken relationships and close relationships that I know are dwindling down to a mere "Hello, how are you? Sorry I've been busy." After Jarrod and I got married, there were so many new revelations about the relationships that I had with family members, that I found myself questioning if I even knew what real a relationship entails. I think a majority of people have come face-to-face with this problem when they enter into adulthood. And I think this is why we find it so hard to stay in relationship with God. I can't tell you how many times I have cried over relationships that I thought were genuine or that I thought would be in tact no matter what the circumstances. I have even grieved over relationships that I've been in where I've found out such disappointing lifestyle behaviors or ignorant thinking took over what I thought was such a genuine personality. In the end, I think God has been leading me to truly understand what it means to have "...a friend that sticketh closer than a brother." (Proverbs 18:24) Jesus is our Ultimate Friend. And I think that, until we get our relationship right with Him, we will continue to have ingenuine, unsuccessful, and broken relationships...or be distraught by them. But, the truth in this verse is...Jesus is the only friend we need. It is a hard truth to swallow. We grow up wanting all of this attention from those we are surrounded by, those we want love and devotion from...those who we love. We have the ultimate love, though...and devotion...a Savior who sacrificed His life for us so that He could dwell in us and one day be reunited with us in Heaven. Sometimes it's hard to get excited about that when you have the here and now circumstances surrounding you. Left and right there are people who are failing you miserably. Maybe the expectations are too high. Maybe they have the same problem. I have had to face the truth that I am one of these disappointments too. In part, my tears might be reflecting this very emotion I feel about myself towards others...and God. But our expectations in God are never too high. He is ever faithful...the only constant in our lives. Through the past several months God has given me a new outlook on my relationship with others. I want to be trustworthy, dependable, and compassionate for those in my life...not because I need them, but just because I love them. I know that Jesus will be the Ultimate Friend in my life, though. Because of that, I want to put all of my effort of devotion and love into Him first and foremost....because He first loved me.
Thank you, Jesus, for loving me so much! Even when there are those in my life that disappoint me; you are the Ultimate Friend that I can count on to be there for me...and You are all I need. <3
